Almost a Buzz Cut

Tonight I'm so excited because tomorrow is my last day of radiation!! My mom and sisters are planning on coming with me to my last treatment and then afterwards I'm sure we will do something to celebrate.

I do feel anxious for tomorrow. I have been looking forward to the end of my cancer treatments ever since I started back in August. I can't believe it is already January and I'm almost done. From the beginning of my fight I knew I would have to be patient and that my journey would be long and hard, but now that I'm almost done, I'm so proud of all that I have accomplished. Looking back at everything I have gone through (from MRIs to bone narrow tests to PET/CTs to fertility treatments to chemotherapy to loosing my hair to heart stress tests to radiation) I'm so glad that I was able to keep such a positive outlook on so many of these scary circumstances. I don't say this for pity, but for encouragement: if I could do it, anyone can.

In August I remember feeling overwhelmed with the idea that my fight with cancer would take so many months. I felt as if it was so unfair that I would have to put my life on hold for this horrible disease. I kept asking why did I have to loose my hair and feel sick, when all the other people I knew in their 20s where out having fun? How could I survive 5 months of fighting a horrible disease like cancer? We'll, now it is almost over and I can proudly say I SURVIVED! I have learned that I am BEAUTIFUL with no hair! I have learned that to enjoy life you don't need to be constantly going out on the town, but what you do need is close FAMILY MEMBERS and FRIENDS. And finally I have learned that in order to fight any illness you need a GOOD ATTITUDE and COURAGE. You don't need to be courageous all of the time, but you need to have enough courage to remain DETERMINED. I admit there were mornings when I didn't want to get out of bed or go to my next chemotherapy session (just the thought of the red adriamycin made me sick) but I knew I owed it to myself to get better, and that in a matter of time this would all be over. Now I'm almost done and I'm so proud of myself for sticking with it.

And talking about sticking with it, my hair is growing back! I would say right now I have almost a buzz cut. My head feels very soft, but you can still see my scalp. Today I took Riley on a walk and I was wearing a hat. When we got back and I took off my hat, I was joking I had "hat hair" because some of my thin hair strands were folded over. Hey, you got to start somewhere. I also like to joke that it is coming back gray. Right now my hair is soo thin that it looks a little gray, so now I get a taste for the future, and I must say I don't look half bad with gray hair-hahaha.

Wish me good luck on my last radiation treatment!
Danielle